Here are the biggest and best lessons from ‘The Mystery Method.’
These five concepts resonated with me the most, confirming my own experience on issues I’ve often dealt with.
1) It’s Your Job To Lead the Interaction
If you want the relationship to head in the direction you want, you have to take responsibility for leading it there. This starts right from the moment you meet. From the beginning and through the end, she will respond to the frame you create:
“It is necessary to keep things interesting during the opening phase of the game. If you don’t work to steer the conversation on two interesting topics, the woman may accidentally raise her own boring topics and then she’ll feel bored and blame it on you.
It may not seem fair that we men are responsible for leading the conversation, but if we don’t, then we may lose the girl. If she feels weird around you but excited around another guy, why would she waste time her time on you?
Make things happen. Take responsibility for your shared experience with her. It’s your job to foster each shared moments and lead her from one to the next with moxie, whether it’s from moving from phase to phase, meeting the objectives of each phase, escalating, venue changing, or something else.”
Especially in the beginning of the interaction, the 90/10 rule applies: you’ll likely have to do 90 percent of the talking. However, you quickly need to….
2) Get Her To Invest
Investment works in two ways. On one hand, investment is a real time demonstration of her desire for you. On the other, retrospectively, she will justify past investment as being due to desire.
“It’s not enough for her to be attracted to you. She must become invested in her interaction with you before parting. The more invested she is in her interaction with you, the more motivated she will be to get a return on that investment.
In other words, the more time she spends with you, the more money she spends on you, the more effort she exerts to get your attention or validation, the more she is emotionally and physically engaged with you, the more likely you will begin a sexual relationship with her.”
Investment is the flipside of compliance. Real pimps strive to achieve the maximum amounts of both from their hoes. Obviously, a middle way might be preferable. Regardless, in the beginning you need to…
3) Baby Step Your Way Through the Interaction
Everything needs to happen, but often slowly. Compliance game, for example, is simply getting girls to allow measured advances on your part. Over time, as a relationship develops, this can be turned into getting her to do things for you.
This growing investment on her part needs to take place slowly, especially in the beginning.
“Remember the principle that it is easier to condition people to jump into small, and innocuous hoops. Without realizing it, they fall into your frame as your hoops become larger and more explicit overtime.
For this reason, when you do the spin maneuver, you don’t say, okay I’m going to spin you around in a little circle let me see your hand. This is much too large of a hoop. Unless you have demonstrated a lot of value, girls will probably give you some trouble on this hoop; it forces their egos to become involved. Instead, say, “go like this,” as you hold out your hand, and then take hers when she mimics you. Then say, now do a little spin, as you spin her around. See how each step is easy for her to follow, bit by bit?
Lead her through the entire interaction in this way.”
4) Train Women
This is obvious. You have to train women to act in a way you like. Believe me, they do it to us.
Mystery touches on it.
“Freeze-out outs are a way to train her. You can use discomfort sparingly to teach her that being nice to you means comfort and fun. When the time has come to build comfort, it’s counterproductive to continue being cocky and ball busty. The punish-reward dynamic must be used instead.”
5) Get Off The Computer. You’ll Only Get Better With Women with Practice.
“The game is played in the field.”
“The field will give you the answers that you seek. Go, and be in the field, and listen to your intuition there. Over time you will calibrate.”
“If the window of opportunity is open and you miss it, don’t expect it to open twice for the same bird – it seldom does. For example, she may go home and backward-rationalize all the reasons that it didn’t happen. In the interest of practice and rapid Improvement, when in doubt attempt to escalate. Even if you’re wrong, it will still improve your calibration.”
Get out there….
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